101 Emotions
Like the phoenix, this is about the power of rising — no matter how many times your spirit is crushed.
· Grief is what happens whensomething mattered and its gone, changed, or cant be recovered.
· Its not just sadness. For me itcan be shock, numbness, anger, longing, relief, guilt, and emptiness sometimes all in the same week.
· Grief isnt a straight line. Itcomes in waves.
· Grief is my system adjusting toa reality I didnt choose.
· It honours what was real even when other people want me to move on orminimise it.
· It makes space for truth:something happened, something was lost, and it affected me.
· In my body:
o Heavy chest, tired bones,aching throat
o Tight stomach, nausea, appetitechanges
o Sleep changes (too much / toolittle)
o A sense of physical emptinessor weight
· In my mind:
o If only thoughts, replaying,bargaining
o Fog, slowed thinking,forgetfulness
o Sudden memories that hit like awave
o Meaning questions: Why did thishappen? How is this real?
· In my behaviour:
o Withdrawing, needing quiet,cancelling plans
o Crying that arrives out ofnowhere
o Numbness or going on autopilot
o Wanting to talk about it / notbeing able to talk about it
· Anniversaries, dates, seasons,places
· Seeing something that remindsme of what I lost
· Being dismissed, not believed,or told to get over it
· Systems that keep reopening thewound (paperwork, decisions, power imbalances)
· Quiet moments when my bodyfinally stops running on adrenaline
· Moments of safety (becausegrief often waits until Im safe enough to feel it)
· Depression: grief can look like depression, but grief is often tied to aspecific loss/change and comes in waves.
· Numbness: numbness can be part of grief it can be my system protecting me from feeling it all at once.
· Anger: anger can be grief in armour.
· Relief: relief can coexist with grief, especially after long-term stress orharm.
· What I need:
o Time. Space. Less pressure.
o Permission to feel it in my ownway
o Gentle routines (food, water,sleep, sunlight)
o People who can witness withoutfixing
o A way to honour what was lost(writing, ritual, memory)
· What has to stop / what Iwont do:
o I wont perform grief to make iteasier for others
o I wont accept minimising,jokes, or at least comments
o I wont let anyone rush mytimeline
· What helps me in the moment(05 minutes):
1. Name it: This is grief.
2. Soften the body: longerexhales, unclench jaw, drop shoulders.
3. Grounding: hand on chest, feeton floor, warm drink.
4. Let the wave move withoutjudging it.
· What helps me the same day(560 minutes):
1. Write a few lines: What I lostwas / What I miss is.
2. Do one caring action (shower,tidy one surface, sit outside, gentle walk).
3. Reach for safe connection (oneperson, not a crowd).
4. Reduce exposure topeople/content that invalidates me.
· What helps me longer term:
o Build a grief-friendly life(more rest, fewer obligations)
o Create a place for the story(journaling, art, memory box)
o Allow mixed emotions (grief +relief, grief + joy)
o Keep boundaries with people whodemand positivity
· If grief becomes constant,unbearable, or makes me unsafe, I treat that as a sign I need more support thana blog post can give.
· Vignette ideas:
o The moment I realised grief waslove with nowhere to go.
o The moment I felt relief andgrief together and stopped calling it wrong.
· When I feel grief, I oftenalso feel: Anger, Numbness, Shame, Fear, Relief
· Tools that support me here: Grounding techniques, Gentle routines, Journaling prompts forgrief, Self-compassion practices
· Im not a therapist. Im sharingmy lived experience and what Ive learned along the way because the more we talk about theseexperiences and emotions honestly, the more chance we have of protecting futuregenerations.
· Read more about this projecthere: About 101 Emotions (link)