101 Emotions
Like the phoenix, this is about the power of rising — no matter how many times your spirit is crushed.
· Calm is the state where my bodyisn’t bracing for impact.
· It can feel like quiet,steadiness, softness, or simply less urgency.
· For me, calm isn’t the absenceof problems. It’s the presence of enough safety to breathe.
· Calm helps my nervous systemrecover.
· It gives me access to clearerthinking, better choices, and more self-respect.
· It’s the state where I canactually feel what I feel without being hijacked by it.
· In my body:
o Slower breathing, unclenchedjaw, less tension
o Warmth in my chest or belly,grounded legs/feet
o Less startle, less buzzing,more spaciousness
· In my mind:
o Fewer “what if” loops
o More clarity and sequencing (Ican find the next step)
o Less urgency, less self-attack
· In my behaviour:
o I respond instead of react
o I can pause before I speak
o I can say no without spiralling
o I can enjoy small thingswithout scanning for danger
· Predictable routines andlow-pressure time
· Quiet environments / reducedsensory input
· Nature, sunlight, fresh air
· Gentle movement (walking,stretching)
· A safe person who doesn’tdemand performance
· Completing one small task(enough control to settle)
· Music, warmth, familiar scents,comforting textures
· If I’ve lived in survival mode,calm can feel like the moment before something bad happens.
· My body can interpret quiet as“danger is coming” because I’m not distracted.
· I might feel restless, guilty,or suspicious when things are peaceful.
· Numbness: numbness is shutdown; calm is present and grounded.
· Avoidance: avoidance is running from feeling; calm is having enough safety tofeel.
· Relief: relief is the exhale after pressure; calm is steadier andlonger-lasting.
· What I need:
o More space between demands
o Less urgency and fewer forceddecisions
o Permission to be slow and stillbe valid
o Environments and people thatfeel safe in my body
· What has to stop / what Iwon’t do:
o I won’t trade calm for chaosjust because chaos is familiar
o I won’t let other people’surgency become my emergency
o I won’t explain my need forcalm to people who use it against me
· What helps me in the moment(0–5 minutes):
1. Long exhale breathing (slowout-breath).
2. Orienting: look around and namewhat is safe right now.
3. Warm drink / warm shower /blanket.
4. One sensory anchor (texture,scent, sound) to stay present.
· What helps me the same day(5–60 minutes):
1. Gentle movement (walk, stretch,shake-out).
2. Reduce input (notificationsoff, fewer tabs, quieter space).
3. Do one small “complete” task(clear one surface, one email, one load of washing).
4. Journal: “What does calm needfrom me today?”
· What helps me longer term:
o Build routines that protect mycapacity
o Practice boundaries early socalm isn’t constantly interrupted
o Create a calm “defaultenvironment” (lighting, clutter, sound)
o Keep coming back to the ideathat calm is allowed, not earned
· If calm feels impossible, or ifquiet makes me panic, I treat that as information about my nervous system — nota personal failure.
· Vignette ideas:
o The first time calm feltboring, and I realised my body was addicted to urgency.
o The first time I noticed calmand didn’t sabotage it.
· When I find calm, I oftennotice: Relief, Hope, Joy
· When I lose calm, I oftenfeel: Anxiety, Fear, Feeling overwhelmed, Anger
· Tools that support me here: Grounding techniques, How I calm my nervous system, Window oftolerance, Gentle routines
· I’m not a therapist. I’msharing my lived experience and what I’ve learned along the way — because themore we talk about these experiences and emotions honestly, the more chance wehave of protecting future generations.
· Read more about this projecthere: About 101 Emotions (link)